The Divine Abodes

The Unity of Love and Equanimity

“Buddha by the lotus pond” — Photo by dbelgard

EQUANIMITY is sometimes described as a state of mind in which there’s neither love nor hate. That’s true if love indicates a possessive and jealous kind of affection. But if we use love to mean the state of mind in which we desire that everyone — without exception — be happy and safe, then love is inseparable from equanimity. This is because love in the latter sense (let’s call it true love) can’t appear until we see the needs of others as equally important to our own. And seeing the needs of others as equal to our own is what we mean by equanimity.

Equanimity is one of the four dimensions in Buddhist teachings that describe the mind in its natural, undisturbed state. They are listed traditionally in this order (with their names in the Pali language in parentheses):

1. Love, in the sense of a heartfelt desire for the happiness and safety of all beings (metta)
2. Compassion for others who are suffering (karuna)
3. Joyful gratitude for the well-being of others who are happy (mudita)
4. Equanimity (upekkha).

These four dimensions are called the Divine Abodes. Since they embrace all beings without exception, they are also called the Illimitables. The Divine Abodes are not four separate things, but four inseparable aspects of a single all-embracing state of consciousness.

When love and compassion are separated from equanimity, they degenerate into affection and pity. When equanimity is separated from love and compassion, it degenerates into a lack of emotion or attitude of indifference. In the experience of true equanimity, awareness deepens into understanding and attention deepens into love.

I originally published a slightly different version of this brief article as Chapter 10, “The Unity of Love and Equanimity” in Breath-Centered Consciousness: The Way of Equanimity (Booksurge, 2008).